You need to work further to rephrase your title and the synopsis- work on clarity of expression and clarity of ideas. Generally the synopsis requires more detail and clarity around the critical questions you want to explore in the dissertation-also you miss pointing to what your conclusions might be- key theorists etc You are using terminology such as ‘ cannon’ slightly incorrectly- we would say ‘ the cannon’ your title should read something like ‘Exploring the cannon of female beauty in animation’ rather than how you have expressed it. Chapter 1 Your starting point is definitely classical Greek sculpture and then the Renaissance- read Ken Clarke The Nude- however Michelangelo is not the best choice unless you are exploring how he made the female form more masculine- which he did- if you are looking at the cannon of beauty I would discuss Da Vinci or Raphael-or Bougerou in the 19th century-you could also read something like Art History the Basics by Newall and Pooke and Practices of Looking: an Introduction to Visual Culture by Marita Sturken as well as general reading on art history. You need to read further around this to define more accurately and from a theoretical/historical perspective what you are trying to discuss. Chapter 2 -this chapter overview is far too broad- your ideas are scattered and not focussed towards moving in a specific way through a set of arguments or points for discussion- you muddle and mix Barbie and Ken with hyper reality- I think you should be looking a Gaze theory here and someone like John Berger who wrote Ways of Seeing Culturally via advertising and through the ways in which it ‘fakes’ the reality of the body via the digital we are persuaded that we must look like something which is unobtainable Read Naomi Wolf The Beauty Myth Chapter 3 it is appropriate to discuss stereotyping and the way in which Disney is moving away from mythology standards of beauty- Here you need to be clear about how the case studies you use- no more than 2 films help prove your point- so here you need reading around the history of film and animation and possibly you need to recognise that some of your discussion engages with the politics of representation and feminism.
ReplyDeleteYou need to work further to rephrase your title and the synopsis- work on clarity of expression and clarity of ideas.
Generally the synopsis requires more detail and clarity around the critical questions you want to explore in the dissertation-also you miss pointing to what your conclusions might be- key theorists etc
You are using terminology such as ‘ cannon’ slightly incorrectly- we would say ‘ the cannon’ your title should read something like ‘Exploring the cannon of female beauty in animation’ rather than how you have expressed it.
Chapter 1
Your starting point is definitely classical Greek sculpture and then the Renaissance- read Ken Clarke The Nude- however Michelangelo is not the best choice unless you are exploring how he made the female form more masculine- which he did- if you are looking at the cannon of beauty I would discuss Da Vinci or Raphael-or Bougerou in the 19th century-you could also read something like Art History the Basics by Newall and Pooke and Practices of Looking: an Introduction to Visual Culture by Marita Sturken as well as general reading on art history.
You need to read further around this to define more accurately and from a theoretical/historical perspective what you are trying to discuss.
Chapter 2 -this chapter overview is far too broad- your ideas are scattered and not focussed towards moving in a specific way through a set of arguments or points for discussion- you muddle and mix Barbie and Ken with hyper reality- I think you should be looking a Gaze theory here and someone like John Berger who wrote Ways of Seeing
Culturally via advertising and through the ways in which it ‘fakes’ the reality of the body via the digital we are persuaded that we must look like something which is unobtainable
Read Naomi Wolf The Beauty Myth
Chapter 3 it is appropriate to discuss stereotyping and the way in which Disney is moving away from mythology standards of beauty-
Here you need to be clear about how the case studies you use- no more than 2 films help prove your point- so here you need reading around the history of film and animation and possibly you need to recognise that some of your discussion engages with the politics of representation and feminism.